From Hair Fibre Prison To Shaved Head Freedom - Jens' Story

Jens was just like any normal 17-year-old, rocking that slicked-back hair, trying different styles, going to the barber, not thinking twice about it. Full head of hair, no worries.

Then his brother noticed something.

"My brother told me, Hey you have a little bit of thinning at the back of your head."

His whole family has a history of it balding. His dad is bald, his brother was also losing his hair too. Jens took a picture of the top of his head and saw it in the photo.

In Jens' words, "it was a little bit concerning," but at 17-18 years old he was still out living his life, going to parties, not letting it consume him. Not yet, anyway.

Building The Illusion

As the years went on, that changed. Jens started covering up his hairline more and more.

"I wanted to give the illusion to people that I had a lot more hair than I really had."

This is the bit so many of us know all too well. The wind blowing when you're out with friends, and instead of just enjoying the moment, you're thinking about your hair. Small stuff, but it adds up.

 

He grew a beard around this time too, something his whole family has but the hair itself, in his words, "was an illusion. It looked more than it really was."

He was even praying about it.

"I was also in my mind like, please, God, don't let my hair be all the way *exposed. Let it stay in place. It was a whole mental thing. It was stressful. It was like a battle."

He stopped putting his head underwater around friends and family so nobody would see the real state of it. Max-hold hairspray became a daily necessity. Swimming became one of the most stressful things in his life instead of one of the most fun.

An important thing to note is that Jens also considered himself to be a guy full of energy. The hair loss didn't stop him doing these activities like swimming and stand up paddle boarding altogether but they did get in the way of him enjoying them to the fullest. 

The People He Could Be Honest With

Not everyone was in the dark. Jens told his girlfriend and his brother the truth, and he says being honest with them "felt very good." His girlfriend even ended up applying his hair fibers for him at one point.

"She was in on the plot."

But everyone else — friends, extended family, colleagues all had no idea.

As Jens put it:

"It was really a prison of my own making."

That's a big line, guys. A prison of his own making. Because even with plenty of energy and a normal life going on around him, the hair was a daily weight.

"It's like every day I had this problem. You wake up with it and you're trying to keep it a certain way."

Below, Before hair fibres 

 

and after

The Moment It Got Called Out

One day, swimming with a friend who didn't know about the hair fibers, it happened.

"He said to me, 'How is that even possible? An hour before you had hair.'"

It's the kind of moment that could crush your confidence, but for Jens it became part of a bigger realisation. One that a lot of guys eventually come to:

"Your hair is like your first identity. You think that its your identity, and you wanted to keep it. But in the process, I also learned that your hair is not your identity."

He looked at medication as an option but never felt it was really what he needed. The fibers kept "saving him," as he put it, for a long time. First just on the back of his head, then eventually the front too, as his hair go thinner and thinner.

The Fear Of What Was Underneath

By this point Jens was very self-conscious, and there was a specific fear a lot of you will recognise:

"What if the bald look doesn't suit me?"

He'd built up such a convincing look with the hair fibers that he was scared of the contrast and worried that shaving it all off would reveal a completely different face to the one people knew. He even looked into a hair transplant, going as far as sitting in a consultation.

 

"I still liked the look of my hair, but it was hair that I didn't even have. It was like a facade."

He was working a job where he talked to people all day, and admits he'd be checking his hairline in the bathroom or on his phone camera constantly throughout the day, just making sure it still held up.

The Vacation That Changed Everything

The turning point came on a vacation to the Canary Islands. Swimming, wind, water, all the things that spiked his stress and Jens had had enough.

"I just wanted to go swimming and do all the activities and not worry about this anymore."

He told his girlfriend he was going to make a decision on this trip. He'd decide if he was going to shave it or get a transplant, but do something.

He didn't pull the trigger on that vacation. But his girlfriend gave him a deadline the following week: decide by Friday.

They had a family weekend at the lake coming up in Germany, and Jens knew he didn't want to spend it worrying about his hair one more second.

So he grabbed a razor and shaved it all off.

"When I did that, I felt like a relief. I said, 'Oh, it doesn't even look that bad. It looks pretty good.' I felt empowered. I was so happy because it was finally over with."

 

His girlfriend's reaction summed it up:

"It is a change, but I like it."

And in a brilliant twist, his brother who'd also been quietly balding saw Jens make the leap and on that same trip decided right then and there to do the same thing.

"Oh, [screw] it. I'm also going bald now." He said.

Life After The Shave

The difference wasn't just physical. Everyone around him noticed the shift in energy.

"You have a lot of energy now, guys. You have to, because we were so free and having so much fun — it was such a contrast than before."

That's the part I always try to get across, guys the sheer amount of energy that gets swallowed up by worrying about your hair. Jens put it perfectly:

"All of the energy that you have inside you was going towards your hair."

Walking into work bald for the first time, he was nervous. But the reactions were the opposite of what he feared.

"It looks good, you can have it."

Colleague after colleague, then his boss, all landed on the same message, clean up the beard a bit and he looked good. That was the moment it clicked for Jens that the fear had been so much bigger than the reality.

Now he's out swimming across lakes with friends from the gym, doing things he used to talk himself out of because of his hair.

"It's finally the life you want to live, and it's so good."

The Big Takeaway

Jens said something toward the end of our chat that I think sums up why I do what I do here at Bald Cafe:

"If it's always in your mental health and in your brain, you really need to start thinking: do I really want to live like this? It's not doing me any favours. Even if I look good, I'm not present in this moment. I'm focusing on my hair."

Like me, Jens decided to face it in his 20s rather than carry it into his 30s and 40s, and now he's fully embracing it.

Massive respect to Jens for being so open about all of this. If you're currently in that stage he was in, covering up, hiding it from people, dreading the wind or a swim. Then I hope this gives you a bit of encouragement and belief in your future ability to move past all of that. 

Thanks for reading, guys and thank you Jens for sharing your story. 

Harry